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David’s Christmas Adventure and how a translation saved the day

 After hearing the noise and eventually realizing what had happened to that poor little helper who had to be scraped off of the wall—Mrs. Claus shook her head in worry.

It was the week before Christmas, and Santa and his Little Helpers were steady at work, packing gifts & stockings and preparing for the Big Day. As Santa was assisting one of his helpers, he suddenly let out a huge sneeze that blew the little helper across the room. After hearing the noise and eventually realizing what had happened to that poor little helper who had to be scraped off of the wall—Mrs. Claus shook her head in worry. “Oh no, not again.” she said, “You’re sick!” Santa nodded his head. “What are we going to do?” She asked. They took some time to think about it until they came up with a solution:

“Why don’t we ask my cousin from Korea, Jin-woo? He’s always been jealous that I got to be Santa instead of him.”  

“But he only speaks Korean, and you don’t speak any Korean. We’ll have to get the list translated for him.” She said. “No worries, …I know just the guy who can help us,” Santa said with a confident smile.

A few hours later, in the office of 1-StopAsia, as David was hovering over his desk with a fly swatter in his hand and looking down at the mouse that the exterminator horribly failed to capture once again—the phone rang. The sound startled the mouse whom David was just getting ready to kill right before it rang, and once again it got away. After screaming a few obscenities, David answered the phone:

“Hello?”

“David. It’s me, Santa.”

There was a short pause.

“…Who?” Said David.

“It’s Santa Claus. You know…Kris Kringle? Jolly Old Saint Nick? …The guy with the huge belly and excessively long white beard that goes around and brings gifts to children on Christmas…” Said Santa as convincingly as he could.

“…This is a joke, right?” Asked David.

“No…I’ll prove it. This Christmas, you wrote down that you wanted a Limited Edition Nes Classic Game Console signed by Charles Martinet; the voice actor of the videogame character, Mario. Does that sound familiar?”

After almost peeing his pants, David cleared his throat and with a raspy tone said, “…Santa…?”

“Yes. Now let’s get down to business.” Santa answered.

After explaining the dilemma he was in and promising David that he wouldn’t tell anyone that a 34-year-old man still writes a Christmas list and sends it to the North Pole—the call ended. About an hour later, just as Santa had promised, he showed up at the office of 1-StopAsia in his sleigh to pick up David to take him back to the North Pole with him. An hour later, they had finally arrived, and after Santa had introduced David to Mrs. Claus, all of the Little Helpers, and Jin-woo, they immediately got to work.

Santa grabbed the list and gave it to David. David grabbed his phone and took hundreds of photos of the humongous list and then forwarded it to a group of Korean translators at 1-StopAsia—who thought David was playing a joke on them until they found their names on Santa’s list, which stated what they wanted for Christmas. After finally believing him and David’s celebration of finding out that he wasn’t the only adult who wrote out a Christmas list and sent it to Santa, the translators got to work.

A few days later, after the translators had finished and returned the newly translated list back to David—Santa handed it over to Jin-Woo, and Jin-woo and his little helpers—oh yeah…I forgot to mention… the agreement was… if Jin-woo was to do this favor for Santa, he had to agree to allow Jin-woo to bring his own little helpers—who also only spoke Korean. So…that’s that…

Anyways…back to the story—Jin-woo and his Little Helpers got to work, and after four days of non-stop packing and gift wrapping, they were finally finished—which was perfect timing because it was now Christmas Eve.

After packing the sleigh with all of the gifts and eating a few Christmas cookies baked by Mrs. Claus herself—Jin-woo & David mounted the sleigh. Jin-woo’s job was to deliver the gifts and David’s job was to speak to the reindeer, because they only understood English. One by one, David called out the names of every reindeer, and the sleigh began to float in the air, and then they took off on their journey.

After delivering every gift to every home in the entire world, David and Jin-woo returned back to the North Pole. As they were exiting the sleigh, a movement from inside of Santa’s red bag had caught their attention. They were a little puzzled because they were sure that they had delivered all of the gifts and that nothing had been forgotten. A moment later, the little mouse from 1-StopAsia’s office came crawling out of the bag. Upon seeing it, David’s eyes began to widen, his face turned red, and steam began to blow out of his ears. He glared down with fury and indescribable frustration at the little possessed rodent, and then lifted up his hand to smite it, and yelled out…”YOU LITTLE—”

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE, from David, Santa, Korean Santa, and the entire team at 1-StopAsia!!!

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